The Lessons We Must Learn

Before we can talk, we can figure out how to get what we need or want. If an infant is picked up and cradled at the slightest fuss or a toddler throws a temper tantrum that results in getting what they were originally denied, they learn to repeat those behaviors. For them, they worked as their goal was achieved. Conversely, should the infant be allowed to fuss for a little while (as long as they’ve been fed and their nappy is clean) or the original denial stands in spite of the tantrum, they learn not to do that again ‘cause it didn’t work.

We progress through life by process of trial and error. We explore our world and learn what we like and how to get it. When we try or do something new or different that then satisfies a need or gives us pleasure; we’ll do it again. We’ll do it regularly. We also learn how to avoid those things that we don’t like. Each of us learns what works for us in our environment.

As school-aged children, we start learning the lessons of what is acceptable socially and what is not. We learn right from wrong. We learn to take responsibility for our actions. As adolescents we start to understand how decisions we make will affect other people. We learn to be accountable to others for how we behave. It’s the lessons we learn from our missteps that we learn best. They inform our mental processes, our mores and our character. It’s the learning of those lessons that grow us into adulthood.